What Is the Reset Process?
The Reset Process is an 8-step practice I use to work through what triggers me — old wounds, hard memories, people who hurt me — so they stop having power over my peace. It's a tool I lean on alongside prayer and scripture, not instead of them. Where the world says "let it go," this gives me an actual path to feel it, name it, and release it before God.
Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. — Colossians 3:13 (NIV)
The 8 Steps
Choose Your Environment
Find a quiet, private space where you won't be interrupted. Settle in — phone down, distractions off — so you can be fully present with yourself and with God.
Select an Unimpeachable Spiritual Guide
Invite a trustworthy spiritual presence to walk through this with you. For me, that's Jesus Christ — someone whose love and judgment I trust completely, who I can lean on through every step that follows.
Select a Trigger — Person or Event
Bring to mind a specific person or event that still has a charge on you. Be honest. Don't pick something vague — pick the real one.
Name the Trigger and the Feeling
Put words to it. What happened, specifically? What does it stir up in you — anger, shame, fear, grief? Naming it takes away some of its power to hide and control you from the shadows.
Feel It Fully
Don't rush past the emotion or numb it. Sit with it in your body and let yourself feel it completely, with your guide beside you. This isn't reliving the wound — it's finally letting it move through you instead of staying buried.
Find the Spark of Gratitude
Even in the hardest moments, look for what good came out of it — strength you gained, a lesson learned, a way it shaped who you are now. Find something genuine to be grateful for, even here.
Forgive It Fully
Choose to forgive — the person, the event, and even yourself if needed. Forgiveness isn't saying it was okay. It's releasing your grip on it so it no longer has a hold on you.
Check In With Your Guide
Return to your spiritual guide. Notice how you feel now compared to when you started. Give thanks, and carry that peace forward with you.
Why I Use This
Recovery taught me that the things I never deal with are the things that end up running my life. The Reset Process gives me a way to actually deal with them — not stuff them down, not pretend they didn't happen, but feel them, find God's grace in them, and let them go.
Goal: Walk lighter, forgive deeper, and let go of what no longer needs to be carried.
This framework is adapted from the "Reset Process" popularized by Dave Asprey in his book Heavily Meditated. I've reworded it here in my own words and through the lens of my faith — for the full original version, check out the book.